scared

if i could make a list of the things that i hate to do, running would be second. (with throwing up/watching others throw up/seeing the sight of throw up/anything having to do with throw up in first place)  i think i can thank high school soccer for my strong hatred of running.  it is painful, i feel like i can't breathe, it can sometimes induce vomiting which frightens me, it makes my chest hurt and i usually cough for rest of the day after i run.  these are probably signs that i am just out of shape but oh well.  i envy people that "need" to run to get through their day or that love it. i really really wish i did. but i don't. at least not yet. 

on the other hand, there are many things that i love to do.  one of those most recent things is reading blogs. and love is probably an understatement, obsession is probably more like it.  and the person to thank for that obsession is libby ryder. many of you who are reading probably know of her because of how much i talk about her.  my family and friends like to pick on me because of how much i talk about her, like she is one of my closest friends because there is one crazy thing.  i have never met libby ryder. but i cannot wait for the day that i do.  her story has changed my life and continues to.  please go to her blog and read her story.  [www.libbyryder.blogspot.com]  and you must start from the beginning. no cheating. 

amazing is an understatement for libby's story and the woman that she is in jesus.  my connection to her is my dear roommate, katie.  katie did work crew at a young life camp one weekend when libby's husband was doing program and libby was pregnant with ava. libby and her husband are on young life staff in chesapeake, va.  after finding my roommate in tears one night after reading libby's blog i decided to read.  i began reading  (from the beginning) the next day in class and i sat through my class and sobbed. for at least an hour straight. after class i came home, got in my bed, and read for the rest of the day, tears constantly flowing.  from that day on, i was hooked.  and i can assure you that you will be too.  

libby is the reason that this blog exists.  i shared the link with one of my very best friends julia and she was instantly hooked as well.  libby is an inspiration in both of our lives and something that we are able to share a love of.  along with a love and heart for libby, me and julia share so much more.  we share a love of high school girls (we are young life leaders), we share a love of jesus, diet coke, lunch dates together, and bargain hunting for clothes.  she knows my heart, my fears, my struggles, my story, everything.  i feel so incredibly blessed to be able to walk through this period of my life with julia, she has been such a blessing and such an encouragement.  we have been through a lot of heartache, loss, things that has broken us, things that have hindered us from the life that jesus has intended for us, things that neither of us necessarily wish was part of our story but it is. and we are confident that those things are in our story for a reason and those things will ultimately be used for the glory of jesus.  but what a blessing it has been for me to have julia and to still have her by my side as my best friend.  i am confident that our friendship will last a lifetime and i am so thankful for her. [love you jules]

a couple of days ago, libby posted a link to her friends blog [thirstyhearts.blogspot.com] -another one that i am probably going to get hooked on.....- and the blog post was about the country music marathon in nashville tn and how they are going to get a group of people together to run for libby.  run by itself is a word i hate. but run for libby is different. i texted julia, told her to read and told her we were going to do it.  her response "i'm scared. but i'm game." my response - "me too". hers back- "lets be scared together. we're starting training tomorrow." 

so we did. we started today. we ran 2 miles. i really really did it. let me confirm that i do not run. but TODAY i, hannah, ran two miles WITHOUT stopping. i know we have a long way to go but i am proud of us.  before we ran, we had a good long talk about what this means for us.  this isn't about being skinny, losing weight, or being able to say that we ran 13.1 miles. it is about throwing off what has hindered us, leaving everything in our past, and running for freedom in jesus.  we will persevere and run the race that has been set before us.  we will run for ourselves, we will run for our past, we will run for the brokeness in our lives, we will run for libby, but most importantly we will run for jesus.

so i ask you to partner with us. maybe you want to run. maybe you want to sponsor us in running. maybe you want to donate to the ryders. but if anything, please pray. pray for us as we begin this journey, pray that we will persevere, pray for strength, and lastly, pray for libby and her family.

we hope that this blog will bring accountability and encouragement. not only encouragement for us but encouragement for you too.  maybe there is something that hinders you or holds you back from the life jesus intends for you.  if so, i encourage you to run, maybe not literally, but run away from those things. and run fast into the arms of jesus where you will find ultimate freedom.

here's to running hard (probably slow but definitely hard)
-han